Funny Quotes About Life Lessons

Hey there, fellow life-explorer!

Funny Quotes About Life Lessons Get ready to chuckle your way through this collection of hilarious quotes about life lessons. Like a rollercoaster ride for your mind.

These Funny Quotes About Life Lessons witty gems will have you grinning from ear to ear. So buckle up, because we’re about to dive into a pool of laughter and wisdom. Ever heard the one about life being like a bicycle? Well, let’s pedal through these rib-tickling insights and see where the journey takes us. Don’t worry, I’ve got your ticket to a sidesplitting expedition into the world of quirky life advice. Let’s roll!

150 Funny Quotes About Life Lessons

Quotes About Life Lesson	Who
“Life is short, so eat dessert first.”	Unknown
“Always borrow money from a pessimist. They won’t expect it back.”	Unknown
“If at first, you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.”	Unknown
“Don’t worry about what people think. They don’t do it very often.”	Unknown
“I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.”	Unknown
“Don’t follow your dreams; follow your Wi-Fi signal.”	Unknown
“If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.”	Steven Wright
“Life is like a camera: Focus on the good times, develop from the negatives, and if things don’t work out, take another shot.”	Unknown
“Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted.”	Randy Pausch
“The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.”	Unknown

“I’m not arguing; I’m just explaining why I’m right.”	Unknown
“Life is like a box of chocolates—full of surprises and disappears quickly.”	Forrest Gump
“I’ve learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.”	Unknown
“I used to jog, but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass.”	David Lee Roth
“If you’re too open-minded, your brains will fall out.”	Lawrence Ferlinghetti
“You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?”	Steven Wright
“Don’t take life too seriously. You’ll never get out of it alive.”	Elbert Hubbard
“I don’t need an inspirational quote. I need coffee.”	Unknown
“Life is tough, but it’s tougher when you’re stupid.”	John Wayne
“The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.”	Oscar Wilde
“If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.”	Henny Youngman
“Don’t worry, be crappy. Revolutionary means you ship and then test… Lots of things made the first Mac in 1984 a piece of crap—it just happened to be a revolutionary piece of crap.”	Guy Kawasaki
“I don’t want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.”	Woody Allen
“The secret to success is knowing who to blame for your failures.”	Unknown
“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving.”	Albert Einstein
“I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.”	Steven Wright
“If at first, you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.”	W.C. Fields
“Life is short. Buy the shoes.”	Unknown
“Don’t grow up; it’s a trap.”	Unknown
“I’m not arguing; I’m just explaining why I’m right.”	Unknown
“Life is like a camera: Focus on what’s important, capture the good times, develop from the negatives, and if things don’t work out, take another shot.”	Unknown
“If you can’t remember my name, just say ‘chocolate,’ and I’ll turn around.”	Unknown
“Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.”	Franklin P. Jones
“A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”	Steve Martin
“I put my phone in airplane mode, but it’s not flying.”	Unknown
“I’m not arguing; I’m just explaining why I’m right.”	Unknown
“Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.”	Unknown
“Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?”	Robin Williams
“Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.”	Unknown
“I’m on the seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.”	Unknown
“A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.”	Unknown
“The only time to look down on someone is when you’re helping them up.”	Jesse Jackson
“The only time to start thinking about retirement is before your boss does.”	Unknown
“I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So, I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.”	Emo Philips
“If you can’t convince them, confuse them.”	Harry S. Truman
“The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.”	Unknown
“Don’t worry about what people think. They don’t do it very often.”	Unknown
“I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.”	Unknown
“Always borrow money from a pessimist. They won’t expect it back.”	Unknown
“Life is short, so eat dessert first.”	Unknown
“I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.”	Steven Wright
“Don’t follow your dreams; follow your Wi-Fi signal.”	Unknown
“If at first, you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.”	Unknown
“The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.”	Unknown
“Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted.”	Randy Pausch
“If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.”	Steven Wright
“The only time to look down on someone is when you’re helping them up.”	Jesse Jackson

funny quotes about life

Life’s Lessons with a Side of Laughter

1. “Life is short, smile while you still have teeth.” – Mallory Hopkins
2. “If at first, you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.” – Unknown
3. “Common sense is like deodorant, the people who need it most never use it.” – Unknown
4. “I’m on the seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.” – Unknown
5. “Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted.” – Randy Pausch
6. “Don’t take life too seriously. You’ll never get out of it alive.” – Elbert Hubbard
7. “Life is like a box of chocolates—full of surprises and disappears quickly.” – Forrest Gump
8. “I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.” – Unknown
9. “The only time to look down on someone is when you’re helping them up.” – Jesse Jackson
10. “Don’t follow your dreams; follow your Wi-Fi signal.” – Unknown

funny sayings about life lessons

Wisdom Wrapped in Humor

11. “The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.” – Unknown
12. “Don’t grow up; it’s a trap.” – Unknown
13. “I don’t need an inspirational quote. I need coffee.” – Unknown
14. “Life is like a camera: Focus on the good times, develop from the negatives, and if things don’t work out, take another shot.” – Unknown
15. “If you can’t remember my name, just say ‘chocolate,’ and I’ll turn around.” – Unknown
16. “A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.” – Steve Martin
17. “I put my phone in airplane mode, but it’s not flying.” – Unknown
18. “Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.” – Unknown
19. “Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?” – Robin Williams
20. “I’m not arguing; I’m just explaining why I’m right.” – Unknown

Funny sarcastic quotes on life Lessons

1. Oh, you’re a genius? Please, enlighten us with your infinite wisdom.”
2. “I’m not saying I hate you, but I wouldn’t unplug your life support to charge my phone.”
3. “Of course I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice.“
4. “Wow, your ability to annoy me is truly impressive.“
5. “Sure, I’ll put my phone on airplane mode. Just let me know when it’s safe to land in your delusional reality.”
6. “Don’t worry, I’m listening. It’s just that your voice is so incredibly mind-numbing.”
7. “Oh, you’re offended by my sarcasm? I’m sorry, while you were busy being offended, I was busy not caring.“
8. “I’m not a gynecologist, but I know a douchebag when I see one.“
9. “Please, keep talking. I only yawn when I’m super fascinated.”
10. “Congratulations on your ability to create drama out of absolutely nothing. You deserve an award… or a muzzle.”

funny inspirational quotes about life

Laughter, the Best Life Coach

21. “If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.” – Henny Youngman
22. “Don’t worry, be crappy. Revolutionary means you ship and then test… Lots of things made the first Mac in 1984 a piece of crap—it just happened to be a revolutionary piece of crap.” – Guy Kawasaki
23. “I don’t want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.” – Woody Allen
24. “The secret to success is knowing who to blame for your failures.” – Unknown
25. “Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving.” – Albert Einstein
26. “If at first, you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.” – W.C. Fields
27. “Life is short. Buy the shoes.” – Unknown
28. “The only time to start thinking about retirement is before your boss does.” – Unknown
29. “I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So, I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.” – Emo Philips
30. “If you can’t convince them, confuse them.” – Harry S. Truman

funny motivational quotes on life

Funny Nuggets of Wisdom

31. “The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.” – Unknown
32. “Don’t worry about what people think. They don’t do it very often.” – Unknown
33. “Always borrow money from a pessimist. They won’t expect it back.” – Unknown
34. “I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.” – Steven Wright
35. “Life is short, so eat dessert first.” – Unknown
36. “I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.” – Unknown
37. “Don’t take life too seriously. You’ll never get out of it alive.” – Elbert Hubbard
38. “I don’t need an inspirational quote. I need coffee.” – Unknown
39. “Life is tough, but it’s tougher when you’re stupid.” – John Wayne
40. “The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.” – Oscar Wilde

short funny quotes About Life

Learning the Fun Way

41. “A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.” – Unknown
42. “I’m not arguing; I’m just explaining why I’m right.” – Unknown
43. “Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.” – Unknown
44. “Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.” – Franklin P. Jones
45. “I put my phone in airplane mode, but it’s not flying.” – Unknown
46. “Don’t grow up; it’s a trap.” – Unknown
47. “I’m not arguing; I’m just explaining why I’m right.” – Unknown
48. “Life is like a camera: Focus on what’s important, capture the good times, develop from the negatives, and if things don’t work out, take another shot.” – Unknown
49. “If you can’t remember my name, just say ‘chocolate,’ and I’ll turn around.” – Unknown
50. “The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.” – Unknown

funny quotes About Life Lessons

Laughter’s Lessons for Life

51. “Life is like a roller coaster – buckle up and enjoy the ride!” – Unknown
52. “Behind every successful person is a lot of unsuccessful years.” – Bob Brown
53. “The only time to start thinking about retirement is before your boss does.” – Unknown
54. “If you want your children to listen, try talking softly to someone else.” – Ann Landers
55. “My wallet is like an onion, opening it makes me cry.” – Unknown
56. “If there’s a will, I want to be in it.” – Unknown
57. “I used to be indecisive; now I’m not so sure.” – Unknown
58. “Life is like a puzzle, don’t force pieces where they don’t fit.” – Unknown
59. “The harder you work, the luckier you get. Or so they say.” – Unknown
60. “I live in my own little world, but it’s okay, they know me here.” – Lauren Myracle

funny one liners Quotes on life

Wit and Wisdom Hand in Hand

61. “To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.” – Steven Wright
62. “Life is like a bicycle – you have to keep moving to keep your balance.” – Albert Einstein
63. “I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.” – Steven Wright
64. “The sooner you fall behind, the more time you’ll have to catch up.” – Unknown
65. “Don’t let your worries get the best of you; remember, Moses started out as a basket case.” – Unknown
66. “If at first, you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.” – Steven Wright
67. “If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.” – Dalai Lama
68. “Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.” – Elbert Hubbard
69. “You can’t have everything; where would you put it?” – Steven Wright
70. “The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he’s a baby.” – Natalie Wood

funny work quotes on life lesson

The School of Chuckles and Chances

71. “I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.” – Unknown
72. “Life is like a Rubik’s Cube – frustrating, but eventually, it all fits together.” – Unknown
73. “Age is merely the number of years the world has been enjoying you.” – Unknown
74. “My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do.” – Unknown
75. “If you’re not part of the solution, there’s good money to be made in prolonging the problem.” – Unknown
76. “Life is like a camera – focus on the good times, develop from the negatives, and if things don’t work out, take another shot.” – Unknown
77. “I may be old, but I got to see all the cool bands.” – Unknown
78. “When nothing goes right, go left.” – Unknown
79. “Don’t let your problems become your passwords.” – Unknown
80. “Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.” – Robert C. Gallagher

funny best friend quotes

Humor’s Guide to Life

81. “I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.” – Unknown
82. “Life is like a jar of jalapeños – what you do today might burn your backside tomorrow.” – Unknown
83. “My life is a constant battle between my love for food and not wanting to get fat.” – Unknown
84. “The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.” – Unknown
85. “The only time to look down on someone is when you’re helping them up.” – Jesse Jackson
86. “I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.” – Steven Wright
87. “Don’t worry, be crappy. Revolutionary means you ship and then test… Lots of things made the first Mac in 1984 a piece of crap—it just happened to be a revolutionary piece of crap.” – Guy Kawasaki
88. “I don’t want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.” – Woody Allen
89. “The secret to success is knowing who to blame for your failures.” – Unknown
90. “Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving.” – Albert Einstein

funny friendship quotes

Living and Laughing Through Lessons

91. “I’m not arguing; I’m just explaining why I’m right.” – Unknown
92. “Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.” – Unknown
93. “Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?” – Robin Williams
94. “Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.” – Unknown
95. “I’m on the seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.” – Unknown
96. “A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.” – Unknown
97. “The only time to start thinking about retirement is before your boss does.” – Unknown
98. “I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So, I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.” – Emo Philips
99. “If you can’t convince them, confuse them.” – Harry S. Truman
100. “The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.” – Unknown